Weed eater

Two West Virginia mountain boys, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their
favorite bar, drinking beer. Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm
tard of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll
go to the community college and sign up for some classes."

Bob thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave the next day Jim goes
down to the college and meets the dean of admissions, who signs him up
for the four basic classes: math, English, history, and logic.

"Logic?" Jim says. "What's zat?"

The dean says, "I'll show you. Do you own a weed eater?"

"Yeah."

"Then logically because you own a weed eater, I think that you would
have a yard."

"That's true, I do have a yard."

"I'm not done," the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think
logically that you would have a house."

"Yes, I do have a house."

"And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a
family."

"I have a family."

"I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must
have a wife."

"Yes, I do have a wife."

"And because you have a wife, then logically you must be a
heterosexual."

"I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of
that because I have a weed eater."

Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the dean's hand and leaves to
go meet Bob at the bar.

He tells Bob about his classes, how he is signed up for math, English,
history, and logic.

"Logic?" Bob says, "What's zat?"

Jim says, "I'll show you. Do you have a weed eater?"

"No."

"Yore queer ain'tcha Bob."