Medicare

The phone rings and the lady of the house

answers, "Hello".


"Mrs. Ward, please."


"Speaking."


"Mrs. Ward, this is Doctor Jones at the

Medical Testing Laboratory. When your doctor sent your husband's biopsy

to the lab yesterday, a biopsy from another Mr. Ward arrived as well,

and we are now uncertain which one is your husband's. Frankly the

results are either bad or terrible."


"What do you mean?" Mrs. Ward asks nervously.


"Well, one of the specimens tested positive

for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for AIDS. We can't

tell which is your husband's."


"That's dreadful! Can't you do the test

again?" questioned Mrs. Ward.


"Normally we can, but Medicare will only pay

for these expensive tests one time."


"Well, what am I supposed to do now?"


"The people at Medicare recommend that you

drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town. If he finds his

way home, don't sleep with him."